Friday of 19th Week in Ordinary Time
MARRIAGE: FAITHFUL LOVE
In poignant, at times almost crude terms, springing from a heart that loves deeply and is hurt by infidelity, the prophet Ezekiel reminds the people of God’s covenant love. What the people are, what we are, we are by God’s love. He has linked his destiny to ours and cannot forget or abandon us, even it we desert him.
God reveals some qualities of his own love in the love of husband and wife. It is a love that reveals, in which a person discloses himself to another person as intimately as possible. It is a love that accepts the other person as he or she is and is willing to share everything together. It is a love that sacrifices all self-interests for the partner. It is a faithful love. It is also a love that is creative, that brings out the best in the other person. Is this not an image of God’s love and, conversely, is God’s Trinitarian love and his love for us not the model of all human love?
First Reading: Ezekiel 16:1-16; 60-63
God’s Message came to me: “Son of man, confront Jerusalem with her outrageous violations. Say this: ‘The Message of God, the Master, to Jerusalem: You were born and bred among Canaanites. Your father was an Amorite and your mother a Hittite.
“‘On the day you were born your umbilical cord was not cut, you weren’t bathed and cleaned up, you weren’t rubbed with salt, you weren’t wrapped in a baby blanket. No one cared a fig for you. No one did one thing to care for you tenderly in these ways. You were thrown out into a vacant lot and left there, dirty and unwashed—a newborn nobody wanted.
“‘And then I came by. I saw you all miserable and bloody. Yes, I said to you, lying there helpless and filthy, “Live! Grow up like a plant in the field!” And you did. You grew up. You grew tall and matured as a woman, full-breasted, with flowing hair. But you were naked and vulnerable, fragile and exposed.
“‘I came by again and saw you, saw that you were ready for love and a lover. I took care of you, dressed you and protected you. I promised you my love and entered the covenant of marriage with you. I, God, the Master, gave my word. You became mine. I gave you a good bath, washing off all that old blood, and anointed you with aromatic oils. I dressed you in a colorful gown and put leather sandals on your feet. I gave you linen blouses and a fashionable wardrobe of expensive clothing. I adorned you with jewelry: I placed bracelets on your wrists, fitted you out with a necklace, emerald rings, sapphire earrings, and a diamond tiara. You were provided with everything precious and beautiful: with exquisite clothes and elegant food, garnished with honey and oil. You were absolutely stunning. You were a queen! You became world-famous, a legendary beauty brought to perfection by my adornments. Decree of God, the Master.
“‘But your beauty went to your head and you became a common whore, grabbing anyone coming down the street and taking him into your bed. You took your fine dresses and made “tents” of them, using them as brothels in which you practiced your trade. This kind of thing should never happen, never.
“‘God, the Master, says, I’ll do to you just as you have already done, you who have treated my oath with contempt and broken the covenant. All the same, I’ll remember the covenant I made with you when you were young and I’ll make a new covenant with you that will last forever. You’ll remember your sorry past and be properly contrite when you receive back your sisters, both the older and the younger. I’ll give them to you as daughters, but not as participants in your covenant. I’ll firmly establish my covenant with you and you’ll know that I am God. You’ll remember your past life and face the shame of it, but when I make atonement for you, make everything right after all you’ve done, it will leave you speechless.’” Decree of God, the Master.
“‘God, the Master, says, I’ll do to you just as you have already done, you who have treated my oath with contempt and broken the covenant. All the same, I’ll remember the covenant I made with you when you were young and I’ll make a new covenant with you that will last forever. You’ll remember your sorry past and be properly contrite when you receive back your sisters, both the older and the younger. I’ll give them to you as daughters, but not as participants in your covenant. I’ll firmly establish my covenant with you and you’ll know that I am God. You’ll remember your past life and face the shame of it, but when I make atonement for you, make everything right after all you’ve done, it will leave you speechless.’” Decree of God, the Master.
Gospel: Matthew 19:3-12
One day the Pharisees were badgering him: “Is it legal for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?”
He answered, “Haven’t you read in your Bible that the Creator originally made man and woman for each other, male and female? And because of this, a man leaves father and mother and is firmly bonded to his wife, becoming one flesh—no longer two bodies but one. Because God created this organic union of the two sexes, no one should desecrate his art by cutting them apart.”
They shot back in rebuttal, “If that’s so, why did Moses give instructions for divorce papers and divorce procedures?”
Jesus said, “Moses provided for divorce as a concession to your hard heartedness, but it is not part of God’s original plan. I’m holding you to the original plan, and holding you liable for adultery if you divorce your faithful wife and then marry someone else. I make an exception in cases where the spouse has committed adultery.”
Jesus’ disciples objected, “If those are the terms of marriage, we’re stuck. Why get married?”
But Jesus said, “Not everyone is mature enough to live a married life. It requires a certain aptitude and grace. Marriage isn’t for everyone. Some, from birth seemingly, never give marriage a thought. Others never get asked—or accepted. And some decide not to get married for kingdom reasons. But if you’re capable of growing into the largeness of marriage, do it.”
Prayer
God, your name is love;
everyone who loves knows you
and anyone who fails to love
can never have known you.
Keep us from separating what you have united:
husbands and wives, parents and their children,
your Son and his Church, friends in their joys and sorrows.
Let all live in your creative, lasting love,
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Reflection:
12 August 2022
Matthew 19: 3- 12
God blesses the choices you make with Him
Once again, Matthew presents a catechesis for his community on issues of marriage and divorce and human relationships. Perhaps he was witnessing troubles in family relationships in his community and reminded them of the sacredness of marriage. The influence of the Judaisers and Pharisees on the Christian community was so strong because most of the believers who accepted Jesus came from the Jewish faith. Now Matthew reminds them of the teachings of Jesus on marriage. It is not an ordinary union of one man and one woman; instead, it is a sacrament – because God wills it in his creative plan.
The world of Jesus and Matthew was patriarchal. On marrying, the wife left her family and moved to the husband’s home, becoming a member of the husband’s extended family. Both remained under the general control of the husband’s father until the father’s death. Within the culture, only the husband could initiate divorce; the wife could not. But, Matthew wished to insist to his community that Jesus denied the universally accepted right of the male within the culture to initiate divorce.
The answer given by Jesus, “What God has joined together, let no person separate,” fails to convince many people even today. Many continue to raise the same question of the Pharisees: “Is it legal to divorce?” The Gospel answers – Marriage is a Sacrament – willed by God – and the Sacraments are for life; they are not meant for a short period.
It is never easy to have two people united as a couple. The Word of God teaches us that married people are no longer two but one. But how does that logic work? It is the logic of love, surrender and sacrifice. The love between the spouses enables them to sacrifice their lives for each other. Jesus often compared his love for his people to the love between spouses. St. Paul would develop this teaching to describe the relationship between the Church and Christ. Love without conditions, total surrender to each other, and even offering one’s life for one’s partner are the principles of marriage. This is how Jesus loves his people – the Church, without conditions, even unto death on a cross. Whoever believes in Jesus and agrees to live by what Jesus taught would not consider separating from one another.
The fear of the disciples of Jesus is our fear today. They say, “it would be better not to marry!” Many youngsters are afraid of making choices in life – choice for marriage and family or choice for religious life and priesthood. They are afraid of failure in their choices. Running away from making life choices is failing to place our trust in God. Pope St. John Paul II told the youth: “God will not make choices for you, but he blesses the choices you make with Him.” Jesus repeats his words of power and encouragement to us: “Do not be afraid, only believe.”
Video available on Youtube: God blesses the choices you make with Him